D-Day, Inc. D-Day, Inc.
When:
Tuesday, 27 Feb 2007
See it! (Gallery)
Who:
Ryan Birk
Details:
In a spontaneous show of ambition, Ryan Birk"-alicious" called out an impromptu challenge -- twenty (20) breadsticks -- on the way to lunch. Hello, Fazoli's. The show started with great news for Birk -- he would only have to pay for four (4) sticks -- Fazoli's would spot him the rest from their bottomless basket o' b-sticks. Yesss.
After laying out a few stacks, Birk got to the order of business at hand: pummeling a pile of sticks. He doubled up, smeeshing two (2) b-sticks into the size of one, thereby halving the amount of work that his mandibles would have to put forth. This fearsome pace continue on through the first half of the event. While there was briefly a question about keeping this food furnace fueled, any such concern was soon squelched as the b-stick fairy came by with her abyss of buttery, garlicky b-sticks and restocked the pile. Whew.
After slowing to a crawl, a few walkabouts, and an unconfirmed deuce, Birk resumed the b-stick bashing, beating eight (8) more hapless sticks into submission. The last two (2) sticks put up a valiant fight, but alas, Birk proved too much for the high-carb challenge. Twenty (20) Fazoli's breadsticks in about thirty-seven (37) minutes. Next event: playing Wonder Bread factory in the first stall of the men's restroom.
When:
Thursday, 10 Nov 2005
Who:
Ryan Birk

Did not achieve goal! In this, his first official food challenge, Ryan oozed confidence about how he was going to pummel the existing record. After a breakfast-free start to his day and some delays, he [finally] made it to the Golden Corral Buffet & Grill. Bring on the Gummies. Upon counting out the first plate full of the still-squirming bears, an official noted how non-fresh these not-so-gummy bears actually were. Ryan's jaw did not seem to care, until after about ten (10) full bears. Talk about some mandibular mayhem! Ouch.
At about the half-way point of the challenge, the ingested bears seemed to migrate their way south, and Ryan opted to free them from their tummy tomb (read: deuce). Now that is "straight-piped". Soon after dropping that batch bears off to the super bowl, in set the realization that failure might be possible, and Ryan began the cursing. He was able to break the two-hundred (200) bear barrier before his fullness stopped him, nearly sending him into hibernation himself. Ryan really had a bear of a time with this challenge, but this will surely not be his last attempt. Nice try, Ryan.